The truth
"Truth is, him and I, we'll never be more than what we are right now. We'll never be a we, we'll never be each other's special someone. That will never happen. That's the undeniable and unchangable truth. that's just how it is.
Between me and him, both of us is an idiot. Who can neither leave nor get closer.
I can go through my days laughing at his jokes in spite of myself, being constantly aware of what he's saying. I can get sad when he's sad and really happy when he's happy. And I can be upset because something went wrong for him. Actually there's no way I CAN'T do any of those things. At least, not now. I have to keep doing what I'm doing because there's nothing else I can do and there's just no way to stop, you know? no way to just stop feeling like this or to stop caring, not for me.
And I have to pray, to hope that one day when he messages me, I won't feel these butterflies in my stomach anymore, because just one message from him makes my day complete. To hope that one day when he talks about the girl he loves, I won't cry myself to sleep anymore because I'm not that girl and I won't ever be that girl. Only then and only then, will this whole thing be over. Only then will I be able to open a new book. It sucks but it's just the way things are.
I dont know how to get there any faster, I dont know what I can do differently. I dont even know if that day exists for me. I dont know anything except that I'M TRAPPED and that, for now, there's no way out."
Between me and him, both of us is an idiot. Who can neither leave nor get closer.
I can go through my days laughing at his jokes in spite of myself, being constantly aware of what he's saying. I can get sad when he's sad and really happy when he's happy. And I can be upset because something went wrong for him. Actually there's no way I CAN'T do any of those things. At least, not now. I have to keep doing what I'm doing because there's nothing else I can do and there's just no way to stop, you know? no way to just stop feeling like this or to stop caring, not for me.
And I have to pray, to hope that one day when he messages me, I won't feel these butterflies in my stomach anymore, because just one message from him makes my day complete. To hope that one day when he talks about the girl he loves, I won't cry myself to sleep anymore because I'm not that girl and I won't ever be that girl. Only then and only then, will this whole thing be over. Only then will I be able to open a new book. It sucks but it's just the way things are.
I dont know how to get there any faster, I dont know what I can do differently. I dont even know if that day exists for me. I dont know anything except that I'M TRAPPED and that, for now, there's no way out."
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